With all the awesome happy things happening lately....
I still feel like shit
All I want to do is sleep all day and eat...
I've fallen so far down.
I dont want to play any video games with dez i just basically want to go to sleep when he gets home.
I hate feeling like this but i dont know how to get out if it.
I dont know how to fix it
on a happier note
To be honest i cant wait go dress shopping and figuring out wedding plans
I have some neat plans, a gothic victorian, part of me wants moer goth than victorian thats dezs thing but we shall see
back to bad things
I wanna scream
i want to be able to have an interest in something again
I wish things didnt always seem like such a turnoff...
I want a weekend away from everything and everyone, and dez and I have talked and he agreed, but i dunno, staying a couple nights at my dads woudl suck cuz i cant take another sunday off work they wont like it and one day wont do it.. so im gunna have to wait a bit..
arrg, i dunno
i cant even type anymore, i used to enjoy typing and blogging and writing poetry and being creative with photos
i just want to be a person again...
i dunno what to think anymore